Citizenship is crucial to the success of our society, yet it's not always a focus in standardized testing, making it easy to overlook. The lesson plan titled "Wrinkle on my Heart" from the Character Education Partnership offers an effective and simple approach to teaching vital social-emotional skills. This lesson emphasizes empathy, taking responsibility for mistakes, learning from them, and thinking before speaking or acting. A powerful visual aid for this lesson is posting a wrinkled heart in the classroom as a constant reminder.
The activity begins by presenting children with a red construction paper heart, representing the heart of a student. Teachers can ask how the heart looks, prompting them to notice its size and color, symbolizing a happy heart. The facilitator then explains that during the school year, many events occur, both positive and negative, and that "not-so-good things can really hurt our heart." Students are encouraged to share examples of words or actions that could hurt their hearts. As they share, the paper heart is progressively folded, symbolizing the accumulation of hurt. After the heart is fully crumpled, students are asked to consider the impact of these hurtful words and actions on a classmate's heart, with typical responses including "destroyed it" and "broken it." The discussion then moves to how the person who was hurt might feel.
Once the heart is unfolded, the facilitator guides the students to understand that even though the heart has been "repaired," the scars remain. This illustrates that even after apologies, people often remember hurtful experiences. The discussion delves into whether it's acceptable for such actions to occur, acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes and sometimes says or does hurtful things unintentionally. A key takeaway is often written on the heart: "No one has the right to put a wrinkle on someone else’s heart."

The Story of "A Wrinkled Heart" and Its Lessons
"A Wrinkled Heart" is a story that powerfully illustrates how words can significantly impact an individual's day, either making it or breaking it. The narrative follows Elliott, a young bunny who starts his day in a great mood, ready for school. However, an accident at breakfast, where he spills milk, leads to his mother becoming cross and reprimanding him, which ruins his morning mood. This experience causes Elliott's heart to wrinkle slightly.
His feelings are further impacted as he boards the school bus and feels unwelcome by his schoolmates. During a painting class, a friend's comment calling his work "ugly" deeply hurts Elliott's feelings, causing his heart to wrinkle even more, leaving him miserable. The situation begins to shift when the friend apologizes, explaining that he called Elliott's painting ugly because it was better than his own. This apology makes Elliott feel better.
On his way home, Elliott observes that the friend who didn't offer him a seat on the bus was struggling to find one. Remembering this, Elliott kindly calls out to his friend and invites him to sit, which helps his friend realize his mistake and strengthens their friendship. This act of kindness makes Elliott's heart feel a bit better.
Upon arriving home, Elliott is greeted with a hug from his mother, who regrets her earlier scolding. This loving reception ultimately heals Elliott's heart. Motivated by his experiences, Elliott promises himself to always be kind and to make every effort not to "wrinkle anyone's heart." The story concludes with a reminder that everyone experiences ups and downs, and it is vital to be kind, as a wrinkled heart causes pain, and some wrinkles can linger for a long time.

"Chrysanthemum" by Kevin Henkes: A Classroom Favorite for Teaching Kindness
Kevin Henkes' book, "Chrysanthemum," is a cherished read-aloud in many classrooms, particularly at the beginning of the school year, and has become a favorite among children. Many students recognize the book, having read it at home or with previous teachers, highlighting the enduring power of books. When reading "Chrysanthemum," the focus shifts to understanding the main character's feelings and the author's message.
During a reading of the book, a large paper heart is passed around. Each time Chrysanthemum is teased about her name, the heart is crumpled. Conversely, when someone is kind to her, efforts are made to smooth out the heart. This activity helps children connect with Chrysanthemum's feelings, understanding how their own hearts can feel "wrinkled and crumpled" when subjected to unkind words. The activity powerfully demonstrates that "words do hurt."
The book serves as an excellent tool for discussing kindness, especially during October, which is National Bullying Prevention Month. The "wrinkled heart" activity, often done in conjunction with reading "Chrysanthemum," helps children grasp the long-lasting effects of their words and actions, even after apologies are given.
The activity typically involves preparing paper hearts for each participant, plus an extra one. As the story is read, students observe whether characters are using kind or mean words. When mean words are spoken to Chrysanthemum, students wrinkle their paper hearts, symbolizing the impact of these words. Conversely, when Chrysanthemum's parents offer kind and loving words, students attempt to smooth out the heart, symbolizing repair. At the end of the book, the crumpled hearts are smoothed out as much as possible, often with tape or Band-Aids. A comparison is then made between a perfectly smooth heart and the wrinkled ones, highlighting the visible and lasting effects of unkindness. The discussion emphasizes that even with apologies, the "wrinkles" from mean words and behaviors remain, serving as a permanent reminder.

The "Wrinkled Heart" Activity: A Versatile Tool for Empathy and Kindness
The "Wrinkled Heart" activity has gained significant popularity among elementary school teachers as an accessible and understandable method for teaching children about bullying and its consequences. The core of the activity involves students straightening and smoothing out their paper hearts. This leads to a discussion about how, while saying sorry is important, it doesn't erase the initial hurtful words spoken.
To further reinforce the message, students can be taught specific phrases to use when they experience or witness unkindness, such as "Please don't wrinkle my heart" or "That wrinkled my heart!" These phrases serve as reminders of the activity and the impact words can have. This approach not only empowers students by equipping them with coping mechanisms but also contributes to curbing bullying in the long run.
The "Wrinkled Heart" activity is an effective anti-bullying lesson that can be extended by teaching students explicit actions to take if they are being bullied. Reading Tracy Hoexter’s book and conducting the "wrinkled heart" activity together provides a comprehensive approach to addressing these issues.
Origin and Development of "A Wrinkled Heart"
Tracy Hoexter, the author of "A Wrinkled Heart," was inspired to write the book after observing her son's kindergarten class using a folktale about a "wrinkled heart" to teach kindness and empathy. She noticed that while this folktale was widely used by teachers, there was a lack of a dedicated book or visual aid to facilitate the lesson. To address this, she wrote out the story and adapted the characters to be animals, believing this would make the story more relatable to children.
For the illustrations, Hoexter collaborated with Lindy Burnett, an illustrator with extensive experience in children's books and advertising campaigns for major brands. Hoexter had previously worked with Burnett on advertising projects and trusted her to bring the story to life visually. Initially, Hoexter sought a publisher for her book but found it challenging to gain interest as a new author.
She then explored creating an ebook herself, initially hiring someone to develop it. However, the first draft was not satisfactory and took months to produce. Discovering Book Creator, Hoexter found it to be a user-friendly and feature-rich platform for creating ebooks, especially for someone with no coding knowledge. She was impressed by the app's ease of use and responsive customer service. Later, she also created a Kindle version using Kindle Kids' Book Creator, noting that it was less user-friendly than Book Creator and required more effort to optimize file size for Amazon's delivery fees.
After completing her ebooks, Hoexter uploaded them to iTunes and Amazon. She actively works to connect with various online communities, including teacher-bloggers, education groups, bullying prevention advocates, kindness bloggers, and church groups, to promote her book and its message.
The book itself is described as a touching and delightful interactive ebook focused on learning to be kind. It features engaging read-along narration, sound effects, and cheerful background music. The story, based on a folktale used by teachers globally, follows Elliott, a young bunny, as his heart wrinkles due to hurtful words and actions from his mother and friends. Although apologies help to remove some wrinkles, the story emphasizes that some remain, teaching readers the importance of kindness, friendship, and the Golden Rule. The book's sophisticated illustrations draw readers into Elliott's world, and it includes a page with "Simple Ways to be Kind to Others" and an activity involving a paper heart to wrinkle as the story unfolds.